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My earliest memory is of my parents fighting. My shoulders were the level of their double bed so I don't think I could have been more than two, I remember my mum saying she should pack her bags and leave. They fought the whole time I was growing up, it was awful. No physical fights, (well except for a few objects that got caught in the way) but lots and lots of yelling and emotional unpleasantness, part of the reason I think i live so far away from them now. Most kids live in fear of what would happen if their parents got divorced. But I was praying for it! But it never happened.
Since I left home, my dad went to work up north near Manchester, he started hanging out with his brothers and sisters again, and generally started to be able to be free from my mum (he was staying up there during the week and only seeing her on weekends, this lasted a couple years till they bought a house and moved up together). In the meantime my mom got herself a girlfriend, not a physical girlfriend mind you, my mom is a total homophobe evangelical christian and believes that it is satan who tempts you in that way. But she spends at least 2 hours talking to this woman on the phone everyday and is incapable of having a conversation without bringing her up. My dad who is much more open about these things, I think has a much better understanding of what is going on. He's been very depressed this year, finally told my mum it was their marriage that was making him depressed and went out and got himself a new flat to move into and told her Tuesday he wanted a trial separation! I'm so proud of him! I never thought he'd have the courage to leave her. He's kinda too easy going for his own good. He's just quietly put up with her shit for years, and sometimes not so quietly, but it's quite amazing that he would be able to take this step and go out on his own. I know it'll be so much better for him this way. I really hope that he'll meet someone new at some point and she'll appreciate him for who he is, cause he's such a great guy and really deserves to be loved for who he is. My mum told me that she was never in love with him, that she married him cause god said they should before they even started dating, oh how crazy.
Alice is worried how mum is going to take it, having relied on my dad to put a roof over her head, and relaxing on a sense of entitlement she got from who knows where. She's never worked more than a couple years in her whole life. And doesn't feel like she should have to. While I think it's good if people want to spend time with their kids, my mum never did. I have no memory of her playing with us, and if you are living off someone else's income then you should at least be civil to them and not start nagging them the secound they walk in the door. Hopefully this experience will let her start thinking about how she treats people, and hopefully get her to think about someone else's feeling for a change. My prediction is that she's going to move back to where we used to live, and within 3 years will be living with her girlfriend. (though that last bit might be a bit of a stretch.)
But I'm really happy for my dad, I hope that life has really good things in store for him. He's had such a rotten life until now, and it's about time his luck changed!
Since I left home, my dad went to work up north near Manchester, he started hanging out with his brothers and sisters again, and generally started to be able to be free from my mum (he was staying up there during the week and only seeing her on weekends, this lasted a couple years till they bought a house and moved up together). In the meantime my mom got herself a girlfriend, not a physical girlfriend mind you, my mom is a total homophobe evangelical christian and believes that it is satan who tempts you in that way. But she spends at least 2 hours talking to this woman on the phone everyday and is incapable of having a conversation without bringing her up. My dad who is much more open about these things, I think has a much better understanding of what is going on. He's been very depressed this year, finally told my mum it was their marriage that was making him depressed and went out and got himself a new flat to move into and told her Tuesday he wanted a trial separation! I'm so proud of him! I never thought he'd have the courage to leave her. He's kinda too easy going for his own good. He's just quietly put up with her shit for years, and sometimes not so quietly, but it's quite amazing that he would be able to take this step and go out on his own. I know it'll be so much better for him this way. I really hope that he'll meet someone new at some point and she'll appreciate him for who he is, cause he's such a great guy and really deserves to be loved for who he is. My mum told me that she was never in love with him, that she married him cause god said they should before they even started dating, oh how crazy.
Alice is worried how mum is going to take it, having relied on my dad to put a roof over her head, and relaxing on a sense of entitlement she got from who knows where. She's never worked more than a couple years in her whole life. And doesn't feel like she should have to. While I think it's good if people want to spend time with their kids, my mum never did. I have no memory of her playing with us, and if you are living off someone else's income then you should at least be civil to them and not start nagging them the secound they walk in the door. Hopefully this experience will let her start thinking about how she treats people, and hopefully get her to think about someone else's feeling for a change. My prediction is that she's going to move back to where we used to live, and within 3 years will be living with her girlfriend. (though that last bit might be a bit of a stretch.)
But I'm really happy for my dad, I hope that life has really good things in store for him. He's had such a rotten life until now, and it's about time his luck changed!